Compassion, Boundaries & Self-Love: The Path to Inner Harmony

Compassion is something the world desperately needs, especially when we look at how things are flowing—or perhaps, not flowing at all. In my line of work, compassion is essential. It’s about finding self-compassion, offering it to others, and holding space for those navigating big feelings, big transitions, or deep moments of awareness.

And yet, I often wonder—how did we get to a place where compassion needs to be constantly brought to our attention? Whether in conversations online, in person, or even in our own thoughts, it seems like we need reminders to be gentle with ourselves and others. With endless distractions and the constant pressure to keep moving, when do we actually slow down enough to sit with compassion?

“Compassion is the radicalism of our time.” — Dalai Lama

What is Compassion, Really?

It’s listening with intention—fully present, undistracted, and open to what someone is expressing from their heart.

It’s holding space in silence, allowing emotions to be felt without rushing to fix or dismiss them.

It’s giving ourselves permission to pause, to nurture ourselves in the highest light, so that we can then extend that same care to others

Compassion is support without judgment. It’s checking in on someone when you know they’re carrying something heavy, knowing that even the smallest gesture—a message, a wink, a kind word—can offer relief. It’s choosing kindness even in moments of frustration or impatience. And in a world of instant gratification, where patience can feel like a lost art, compassion often calls us back to it.

When we have compassion, we can better work with our boundaries. Boundaries are what we continually push aside as we don’t want to see how we really flow within and around our boundaries. It is easy to put an imaginary line in front of us and have our boundaries become barriers as we use them as protection that create a hard stop. It is not so easy to create an inviting boundary where we are open to receiving what feels right and what will help us shift, align, grow and possibly have us step out of our comfort zone.

The Power of Boundaries

These last few years, boundaries have become a big topic of conversation. Some of us are working to solidify them in our interactions, while others avoid looking at them altogether because standing firm in our boundaries can feel like loss. If we stand strong in our boundaries it will invite relationships to change, life as we know it will shift, and we will have to do things differently… and that invites discomfort.

But what if we viewed boundaries differently?

I firmly believe that the body is where healing happens. From a young age, we learn to fit in, to be a "certain way," only to realize in adulthood that this path may not have been our most authentic one. Eventually, many of us reach a point where the façade we created no longer works, and we must unlearn what we were taught.

Often, this realization leads people to therapy—usually talk therapy. While this can bring awareness and insight, I see missed opportunities when people want to go deeper but don’t know how. That’s when they come to me for a boundaries session. More than once, I’ve heard, "I’ve had more shifts in this session than in my last few therapy sessions."

Why?

Because boundary work invites you to explore how your body views your boundaries—not just how your mind understands them. It’s difficult to explain and powerful to experience. When you consciously witness what your subconscious already knows, deep shifts begin to happen, and new paths start to unfold.

According to Dr. Gabor Maté, renowned trauma and addiction expert, “When you shut down emotion, you’re also shutting down vulnerability, openness, and connection.” Boundaries aren’t just about saying no—they’re about creating space for deeper connections with ourselves and others.

If boundaries feel uncomfortable, maybe it’s time to dig a little deeper. To listen to what your body wants you to feel and see—rather than just what your mind is telling you. You might be surprised by what unfolds.

The Bridge Between Boundaries & Self-Love

And now, let’s take compassion and boundaries and wrap it up with self-love.

There is something to be said about self-love and how it shows up in your life. To truly love ourselves means to accept ourselves as we are. And to accept ourselves as we are requires compassion—for every part of us. The darkest parts and the brightest parts.

As a society, we often focus only on the beautiful, kind, and generous aspects of who we are. But we hold all of it. When we learn to love the parts that feel shameful, guilt-ridden, angry, or resentful, we give them space to breathe. Space to show up, to be seen and heard. And in that space, so much is revealed to our conscious mind… truths we may not have fully realized or understood before.

When we accept all of our being, self-love no longer feels like a forced practice or something just out of reach. It becomes something natural, nourishing, and in harmony with who we are.

With boundaries that reflect our authentic selves and the compassion to dive into a deeper knowing of who we are, self-love becomes so much more accessible. This connection to ourselves creates a lightness within—a shedding of burdens we’ve carried for far too long.

If you don’t know where to start with self-love, start with boundary work.

Here, you will find compassion and healing. And as those pieces come together, love will flow to you and through you. And that is a beautiful place to be.